Bethany Kristiansen
Licensed Cosmetology & Esthetics Educator ✦ Somatic Facialist ✦ Facial Massage Specialist
I have been a licensed, practicing member of the beauty industry since 2007. I started in cosmetology and began teaching soon after in 2009. The majority of my career has been spent in schools educating new industry professionals, both in cosmetology and esthetics.
For the last few years I have dedicated myself to the art of facial massage and nervous system regulation. I am currently in the process of getting my massage therapy license so that I can expand my offerings.
I wish I could say I always knew what I wanted to do and that my path was easy, but that is not true and I don't think it's a reality for most people.
People often ask what led me to this career and the answer is... I have no f*cking idea (the universe obviously had a plan but TBH I don't think I was in on it). I don't know how I came to the conclusion that I should go to cosmetology school. My best guess is I was a young single mom, I was basically homeless, I needed a career fast and I saw others do well with hair. And it turns out I was the literal worst student - my environment was unstable, I wasn't motivated and I constantly skipped school.
For some reason that school kept taking chances on me, caring for me and giving me opportunities. Long story short - they changed the path of my life. When I finally graduated I knew that I wanted to teach so I could do the same for other people.
Throughout my teaching career I found myself leaning in to all the classes we would teach on mindset, positivity, connection, psychology, etc. I became interested in how we all interact with and connect with each other, and how touch + human connection make the beauty professions so much more than just about "beauty." We are in such intimate settings and have opportunities to form deep, healing bonds with clients. I also became interested in why the beauty industry is so stigmatized. Eventually I made my way from hair to skin and the same themes were showing up in my questioning of it all.
When COVID hit... well, everything changed for a lot of us. For me, the biggest reckoning was that my life was not balanced - I was working too hard and my nervous system was a serious mess from years of workplace trauma and financial scarcity. I became really focused, like many of us did, on why I was grinding so hard and creating so much for a company that didn't care about me and an industry that I felt was broken.
The conversations I have with students and clients daily continue to reinforce my belief that our industry is going the wrong direction, and it is our place as members of this industry to change its course.
Here are some of the things I feel we are doing wrong and hurting each other, ourselves and our industry in the process:
- Schools are just churning students out - enrolling as many as possible to make $$$ - without any care as to whether they are actually learning what they need to be successful
- Instructors are SO OVERWHELMED, UNSUPPORTED and UNDERPAID
- There is a lot of workplace trauma for instructors in schools, and even more for students once they graduate and begin to work in toxic salons + spas
- The industry is not regulated when it comes to machines, training, etc. so there are a LOT of scammy scammers out there taking people's money and making false promises
- Esthetics has become all about machines and no longer about touch
- All of our training comes from brands trying to sell product and is inherently biased
- There are too many voices on social media making absurd claims and commentary just to get likes, which splits our industry into sides
- The splitting of everything into black and white, either/or sides is getting rid of all the nuance and education it takes to be a really good esthetician
- Most people do not have regulated nervous systems, so they don't know how to deal with the every day challenges of running a business, don’t know how to engage with clients who are not regulated, can’t approach their own finances, don’t know how to set boundaries at work or even be a solid employee
The hardest part for me to experience is that at our core, MOST of us are healers and want nothing more than to make others feel good. Unfortunately our industry thrives on a toxic, foundational belief that we are not good enough and need to be fixed. The estheticians are being told they need machines to get results and the machines are what have value, not us. The clients are being told they don't have good skin or facial structure, they need botox or filler or any number of services to change it. And we, as a society, are told aging is bad and we must do whatever we can to reverse it, even though we should be thankful that we have lived long enough to show signs of aging. This needs to change.
We need to spend less time being sold "easy" solutions and more time trying to actually understand what will work for us.
What will make us happy? What is fulfilling? What is a balanced life? What helps us to be sane and grounded and feel really good?
My Journey into Holistic Esthetics
I was raised by my dad, who was an Acupuncturist and Oriental Medicine practitioner. My entire life I was exposed to holistic healing methods and energy work so the concepts have never felt foreign or new to me. However, I did not fully believe in the power of energy work or feel like I had space for it in my life until I had to work through grieving the sudden, unexpected loss of my dad. When we cleaned out his house, I brought home a collection of items that meant something to me in the moment and I will be honest - for a few years, I could not figure out why any of them meant anything, but I knew I couldn't get rid of them.
Then I decided to invest in setting up a treatment space in my house during COVID and as I did that, I found myself placing these items in that space. First was the books, then the crystals, the tuning forks, drums, flutes, oracle cards, etc. They just seemed to fit here and I began to explore how these could be used in my facial treatments. This exploration was an important part of my healing process and opened my mind to spirituality in a way that it had never been before.
✦ This photo of my dad sits on my treatment room altar.
The more I work with these items of my dad’s, and as I share them and connect with people like you, the more I feel my dad around me. He was truly a healer and I see him as the spirit guide of my business as we go through this journey together, embracing our paths to heal ourselves, each other + this crazy world.
I have been so happy to see an increase in excitement surrounding facial massage, Gua Sha, crystals, sound healing, energy work + much more in our industry.
My ultimate goal is continue to educate as many people as possible about what makes US valuable - our knowledge, our hands + our ability to treat the whole person. I don't expect anyone to embrace all of these concepts, but I am here to empower you + help you find your path, whatever that is.
💙 xoxo 💙
Bethany
